Insights – Melannie Thomas

Author Archive

…a temporary pause or absence; a break from routine.

My first blog-post, Intuition, was published in February 2010.  I have been publishing weekly since then.  The time for my six week hiatus has come.  I will resume posting on September 16, 2019.

During my hiatus, I invite you to visit the archives, which are listed by month and year, not title.  Exercise your intuition!  And if you are inclined, share your experience with me, send an email to melannie@melannie-insights.com.

Looking forward to being back with you in September!

Blessings!

A client gifted me with this wonderful book.  It is written by Mark Nepo, poet and philosopher.  Author of several books, he has been teaching in the fields of poetry and spirituality for more than 40 years.

The Book of Awakening is subtitled, Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have.  It is arranged as a daybook.  The author says, ‘In truth, over the last twenty-five years, the daybook has been answering a collective need and has become a spiritual sonnet of our age, a sturdy container for small doses of what matters.’

Each of the 365 pages begins with a topic/title like Sabbath Time, The Hearts Blossom, Outlasting the Fog, Against Our Will, One Drop of Truth at a Time, and Giving Up What No Longer Works.

Next is a quote by various authors, including Nepo, expressive of the topic.  For example the quote for Giving Up What No Longer Works is:

‘Burning your way to center

is the loneliest fire of all.

You’ll know you have arrived

when nothing else burns.’

A brief text follows, concluding with meditation instruction allowing us to digest…”small doses of what matters.”

I am so blessed and grateful for this gift, an amazing introduction to Mark Nepo and his work.

I invite you to check it out,  it is well worth the effort!

Blessings!

‘…limiting laws, rules or circumstances, boundaries, caps, confines and controls.’

All life forms and processes have limitations.  There are the fundamental limitations of natural physics; the law of gravity, for example.  And there are the imagined limitations of the psyche; like fear of success or fear of failure.

There are outstanding and inspirational examples of people who have challenged their limitations:  Helen Keller, Stephen Hawking and Temple Grandin are some that come immediately to mind.  Their stories are well known to most of us.

Then there are everyday people like Rob Mendez, a successful high school football coach who received the Jimmy V award at the ESPY’s last week.  Born without arms or legs he said as part of his acceptance speech…”I am here and if there’s any message I want to give you guys tonight, it is look at me…when you dedicate yourself to something…and focus on what you can do instead of what you can’t do, you can really go places in this world.”

All the people mentioned above still had limitations that required, indeed, demanded that they live within their physical boundaries.  What they all have in common is a strong belief that they could live a full, satisfying, rich and abundant life in spite of those limitations.

“We all have things that limit us and that challenge us.  But really, our real limitations are the ones we believe.”  ~Amy Purdy

We all have our personal limitations and challenges.  This week I invite you to inventory your limitations, separating out those that are fundamentally implacable from those that are intellectual and/or emotional fabrications.

“The human body has limitations.  The human spirit is boundless.”  ~Dean Karmazes

Blessings!

Swamped is where I am at the moment, flooded by demands on several fronts.  My ship is not sinking and I am attending to making sure it does not.  Just finished having my house painted.  Busy putting things back in order; and preparing for a big family gathering as well as pondering the imponderability of daily living.

As I prioritize my time and activities, today’s blog post becomes what you are reading.  We all have these moments.  It is so important to manage our energetic output so that we stay healthy.

Blessings!

Wishing everyone a red, white, and blue, star-spangled 4th of July!

Blessings!

Shame is self-bullying behavior.  Shame can be toxic, and deadly.

“Shame is the most powerful, master emotion.  It’s the fear that we’re not good enough.”  ~Brene Brown

Shame is, “unpleasant self-conscious emotion typically associated with a negative evaluation of the self, withdrawal motivations, and feelings of distress, exposure, mistrust, powerlessness, and worthlessness….”  (Wikipedia)  I would add ‘inadequacy’ to the above definition.

Shame avoidance is common; we try to hide and conceal our shame, or escape it by shaming another person to relocate shame outside of our self.

For example, many people who are overweight in our svelte worshiping culture, often try to hide their shame with clothing, or by withdrawing from the social milieu.  Conversely, they may engage in shaming thin people, projecting their shame outside of themselves.

The shame experience can trigger anger, activate abandonment fears and create unrealistic comparisons.  Transferred toxic shame can make the recipient physically and emotionally ill.

It is important to distinguish shame from guilt, embarrassment and humiliation.  Guilt is reacting to having done something bad, shame is the belief that we are bad.  Embarrassment is feeling self-conscious, uneasy and awkward when committing a social faux pas or engaging in scandalous behavior that becomes public knowledge.  Humiliation is disgrace, condescension, dishonor and shame.

Acknowledging our shame, working to understand our ‘inner life’ gifts us with an invaluable opportunity for achieving personal growth and psycho-spiritual maturation.

Working with shame requires us to recognize that we are not what we do.  When our self-worth is attached to our roles as parents, daughters, sons, siblings, husbands or wives, artists, entrepreneurs, employees, scholars, etc., we will experience soul-devastation when things don’t go well.

“The underbelly of the human psyche, what is often referred to as our dark side, is the origin of every act of self-sabotage.  Birthed out of shame, fear, and denial, it misdirects our good intentions and drives us to unthinkable acts of self-destruction and not-so-unbelievable acts of self-sabotage.”  ~Debbie Ford

It is paramount when working with shame to be loving and compassionate to ourselves.  Insecurities will arise, often when we are most vulnerable.  Strive to identify the feelings behind them.  Seek their origins and test them for their validity.

Move away from shame and toward embracing your authentic self, not the ‘who’ you think you are.

Blessings!

There are many kinds of treasure, tangible and intangible.  Wealth and riches, especially in the form of money, precious gems and precious metals, things that we value, are tangible forms of treasures.

Treasured relationships, spiritual strength, cultural heritage, a person who is greatly loved, respected or valued for their altruism and inspiration, these are examples of intangible treasures.

An article in The Press Democrat (Sunday June 9,2019) brought to my attention a treasure I didn’t know existed…The Windsor Historical Society’s museum.  The story of the Hembree House where artifacts, and relics of this area’s rich history are on display, was so interesting.  A photo of hand-carved wooden tools, created by the late George Greeott amazes and entices me to the museum to view his wood sculptures, described as excellent abstractions…”that possess a flowing, sinuous beauty.”

And the story of Fred Wiseman.  He built his own biplane in a tent, practiced takeoffs and landings on the Laughlin Ranch, before flying the first air-mail letter ever, from Petaluma to Santa Rosa in 1911.  His was also the first plane ever built in California.

Like our National, city and community parks, this historical museum and many others like them are true treasures.

This week I invite you to plan an outing to a local museum to relish the amazing treasures they preserve for our edification and enjoyment.

…or Shinrin-yoku is a form of nature or ecotherapy designed to improve a person’s mental and/or physical health specifically by spending time in wild nature settings.  Developed in Japan in the 1980’s, it has become a model for helping to establish forest therapy throughout the world.

‘Why?’ you might ask, ‘is this movement growing in popularity.’  A compelling explanation can be found in “The Human Relation With Nature and Technological Nature” by Peter H. Kahn Jr., Rachel L. Severson and Jolina H Ruckert’s article which appeared in the Association for Psychological Science, 2009 Vol 18-Number 1.  The authors discuss the pros and cons of the increasing reliance on technology as alternatives to physically being in nature’s wild places…which are becoming harder to access.

Watching Planet Earth, streaming nature videos, creating nature window screens, staring up at nature vignettes in a medical treatment or surgery prep room, reduce anxiety, create happier more productive work environments, and are soothing and restorative.  But they are incomplete substitutes for the real thing.

When we sit quietly for 20-25 minutes in wild nature, our internal chatter shuts off allowing us to become part of the environment, not just observers.  The natural world around us accepts our presence, and the interplay between the full cast and characters resumes.  There is an energetic shift that is palpable; a kind of meditation that is immersed in awareness, mindfulness and wellness.  We  become an intrinsic part of the whole.

John Muir wrote, “Thousands of tired, nerve-shaken, over-civilized people are beginning to find out that going to the mountains is going home.  Wilderness is a necessity.”

This week I invite you to bathe in the forest.

Blessings!

So many of us are feeling the unsettled energy of the cosmos, including myself.  It feels like Mercury never came out of it’s March retrograde.

Curious, I checked the planetary patterns.  Turns out there are five planets currently in retrograde, and Mercury isn’t one of them!  Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto are the retrograding planets.  Mercury will join them beginning July 9th.

The effects on us personally, vary depending on where these planets are in our natal chart.  Retrogrades provide opportunity to reflect, examine and understand past experiences and make adjustments if necessary, leading to greater emotional and spiritual maturity.

If you have been feeling the out-of-sorts energy, I’m hoping that this insight will give you a better understanding of the current personal and planetary energetics.

Blessings!

Refuge is shelter and/or protection from danger, trouble and persecution.

There are many forms of refuge:  wild-life, homeless, psycho-spiritual, behavioral, safety, retirement, educational, arts and creativity, monastic or social, altruism and tyranny, family and friends, career and vocation.

The two main forms of refuge are ‘outer’ and ‘inner’.  They are not mutually exclusive, as both can be exercised simultaneously. In all of these processes, the goal is comfort and security.

As referenced above, refuge can be positive or negative.  Seeking refuge in chronic helplessness, anger or self-righteousness is seeking security regardless of the dysfunctional quality, however, it can lead to alchemical transformation.  Seeking refuge in nature, creativity and the pursuit of personal growth is security seeking behavior, and, it also, can be energetically positive or negatively transforming.

Refuge does not inure us from experiencing the problems and suffering coming from our ‘little’ world or from the ‘global’ world.  It does provide ‘time out’; it gives us respite.

This refuge provides the opportunity to connect to the spirit of our true selves; and to the Great Spirit…inner and outer refuge…ultimate security.  It is in this niche that we find the solid footing that enables us to stand against the fiercest winds of adversity and not be shaken loose.

I invite you this week to explore your personal refuges.

Blessings!