Insights – Melannie Thomas

Archive for the ‘Coaching Tips’ Category

Worldwide celebrations of Earth Day took place Sunday April 22,  reminding us of  the importance of preserving wilderness and honoring nature.

“Wilderness is harder and harder to find these days on this beautiful planet, and we’re abusing our planet to the point of almost no return.”  ~Betty White

Studies conclude that living in areas where we can see trees and watch birds can have a positive effect on our mental health. (https://phys.org)  This growing body of evidence is showing what many of us already know…that experiencing natural environments can reduce stress levels, anxiety and depression.

“Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul,”  ~John Muir

“There are moments when all anxiety and stated toil are becalmed in the infinite leisure and repose of nature.”  ~Henry David Thoreau

Immersing myself in nature is healing and grounding.  Mind-emptying meditation allows me to merge with the natural landscape.  It is a wordless, thoughtless place that brings great refreshment to my spirit.

“There is pleasure in the pathless woods, there is rapture in the lonely shore, there is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in it’s roar; I love not Man less, but Nature more.”  ~Lord Byron

As Spring blossoms into it’s fullness, it is a perfect moment to savor the gifts of nature.

“The advance of technology is based on making it fit in so that you don’t really even notice it, so it’s part of everyday life”  ~Bill Gates

I have been without phone, internet and wi-fi for eight days, having only the ability to text and make calls on my cell. (Thankfully!) There is a problem where I live with old delivery lines, and the situation has been going on for over a year.  It has been tough.  It has been frustrating.  It has been very stressful!

With the gracious help of my webmaster, I have been able to keep a semblance of my business going.  Without her efforts on my behalf, I’m not sure how big a ‘hit’ I would take.

I regularly subscribe to Gretchen Rubin’s quote: “Turn off your email; turn off your phone; disconnect from the internet; figure out a way to set limits so you can concentrate when you need to; and disengage when you need to.  Technology is a good servant but a bad master.”

When I do all those things at the same time, it is a peaceful, renewing and rewarding experience.  It helps slow me down and strengthens my connection with the natural world.

“Technology has forever changed the world we live in.  We’re online, in one way or another, all day long.  Our phones and computers have become reflections of our personalities, our interests, our identities.  They hold much that is important to us.”  ~James Comey

Gates and Comey are right.  Technology fits easily into everyday life, and it does hold a great deal that is very important to us.  I am discovering that it is quite a different experience to choose to disconnect versus being disconnected when I don’t want to be.

Sadly, the fix for my problem is most likely temporary, like the fixes of the past year or more, and I will be disconnected again not by choice.

“It is only when they go wrong that machines remind you how powerful they are.” ~Clive James

Spring is in full swing in my neighborhood.  The sun’s warmth seeps into the earth  (and into my old arthritic bones), awakening us all  from winter slumber.

The tulips are blooming in celebration of the spring Holy Season.  Fruit trees are budding with the promise of wonderful plums and pears.  Vegetable beds patiently await to be spaded and planted.

Spiritually, emotionally and physically, it is a perfect season for our rebirth.  Shedding the dark coldness of winter, we embrace movement toward the blooming of our authentic selves.

“There is a rebirth that goes on with us continuously as human beings.  I don’t understand, personally, how you can be bored.  I can understand how you can be depressed, but I just don’t understand boredom.”  ~Dustin Hoffman

“Whether one believes in a religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn’t anyone who doesn’t appreciate kindness and compassion.”  ~Dalai Lama

Embrace the rebirth of spring!

The 1st Amendment right of people to peacefully assemble, to speak freely, to address or petition the government for redress of grievances.

America has a rich, and sometimes volatile, history of marching to redress inequality.  Notable: the marches of the civil rights movement, protesting the Vietnam war, LBGT rights, and, the biggest march in US history, the one day Women’s March on Washington in January 2017 in which an estimated 4.2 million people gathered.

Saturday March 24, marks the first time that the youth of our Nation marched together in the Many Lives Matter protest.

I am mightily heartened about the future of my country when I hear these articulate, passionate young people demanding a change in the status quo of political lethargy.

I invite you all to read a letter in LET THE PUBLIC SPEAK section of Saturday’s Press Democrat, written by Peyton Krzyzek a student at Santa Rosa High School.  It powerfully and poignantly captures the fear our young people endure everyday in an environment that should be providing them with the best education possible in a safe and secure manner.

Ironically, to me anyway, in the same issue on page A10, is an article about protecting classes with rocks.  David Helsel, superintendent of the Blue Mountain School District in northeast Pennsylvania, has equipped each classroom with a five-gallon bucket of river rocks.  This arsenal is described as ‘last ditch‘ option for students trapped and hiding under desks.  Rather than being helpless targets of an automatic weapon in the hands of a crazed killer, these kids can fight back by standing up and throwing rocks at their assailant.  Helsel said, “Obviously a rock against a gun isn’t a fair fight, but it is better than nothing.”

Perhaps we as a Nation should rethink our position on armaments.  Give the Secret Service buckets of rocks to protect the President and Congress.  Likewise our Police and Sheriffs departments throughout the country.  And arm our military with tons of rocks instead of guns.  Armored tanks could shoot rocks at the enemy, our Air Force could drop rock bombs, missiles could be armed with rock heads, not to mention a whole new era of rock(et) launchers.

It is ridiculous to imagine.  Yet, this is considered a feasible, realistic way to protect our children in the classroom?

The young people behind the Many Lives Matter movement are becoming eligible to vote.  Indeed, in some states where the voting age is 18, they will be going to the polls this year.

If these young adults sustain their passion, and I believe they will, change will come; lethargy and self-serving duplicity may no longer be the norm on Capitol Hill.

Spring begins with the Vernal Equinox on March 20.  It is a time of rebirth and renewal in the Northern Hemisphere.  Spirit and Matter, Heaven and Earth meet equally in this precious moment.

This year has an interesting twist, as Mercury goes retrograde on the 22nd, and remains there until April 15.

As you reflect on the past year, reviewing the harvest from the Fall Equinox of 2017, and noting the gifts of the Winter Solstice, my question is, “What are you planting in your spiritual garden this spring?”

As you sort and sift through the seeds you have accumulated, added some new varieties you hope will take root and grow into glorious bloom, take note of the retrograde.  Don’t plant your crop prematurely.  Patience is the greatest ally of the spiritual gardener.

“Behold, my friends, the spring is come, the earth has gladly received the embraces of the sun, and we shall soon see the results of their love.”

~Chief Sitting Bull

Wishing you all many rich blessings of Spring.

The world feels more unjust than I could have ever imagined.  The iconic image of Justice appears to be turning a blind eye to rampant injustice, rather than to judgment without partiality. It’s becoming increasingly harder to believe that justice will prevail.

The Wheel of Fortune in the Tarot succinctly expresses cycles of change; everything is dying, and everything is becoming simultaneously.  What is signified by the Justice card is the balancing of this energy…perception without distortion.  The capacity to view reality with objectivity.

In Jung and the Tarot Sallie Nichols writes, “The sword (in the Justice card) represents the golden power of discrimination which enables us to pierce through layers of confusion and false images to reveal a central truth.”

Justice assumes responsibility for weighing all sides of an issue before making a decision.  I am finding this task increasingly challenging; working harder than ever to keep my sword sharp.  Cutting through copious, dense layers of hyperbole and obfuscation quickly dulls the blade.

“There is no greater tyranny than that which is perpetuated under the shield of law and in the name of justice.”  ~Charles de Montesquieu

Fair, responsible decision-making demands logical, rational, objective thinking.  And the demand for spiritual discernment is of equal importance to the process.

“Until the great mass of the people be filled with the sense of responsibility for each others welfare, social justice can never be attained.”  ~Helen Keller

As the dark forces continue to rise, it is of a greater necessity than ever before to engage spiritual discernment, compassionate sentiment and rational thinking into forceful allies of survival.

I invite you this week to sharpen your swords and hang tough.

Blessings to all!

Everything we do requires effort.  To move the body, to think, to reflect, to create, to destroy, to love, to hate, to speak, to teach, to learn, to lead, to follow…everything!

It takes a great deal of effort to mature well…to be happy; to achieve personal success that is harmonious with our authentic self.

No movement, no change is effected without effort.  It is the quality and direction of effort that creates well being or unhappiness.  This amazing ability is inherent in us all.

As toddlers, learning to walk requires great effort and tenacity.  It requires getting up fall after fall, learning to balance the body as it stands and moves. So to, such effort is required to grow mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

“Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle.” ~Napoleon Hill

The greater portion of success is directly related to the amount of effort that is applied to sought after goals.

“Pause today and notice some thing you have worked hard on and recognize yourself for it.  Acknowledge your effort.”  ~Kristin Armstrong

“Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to become the best of which you are capable.”    ~John Wooden

I invite you this week to acknowledge the fruits of your labors, your efforts.

The Florida school massacre prompted me to blog about our country’s recent history of mass killings.  I changed my mind and chose another topic. Then I saw a Facebook post that pulled me back to massacre.

Massacre is defined as …’the indiscriminate and brutal slaughter of people’; deliberately and violently killing (a large number of people)’. Sadly, massacre is part of human history.  Hitler used gas ovens and automatic weapons in his crazed genocidal persecution of Jewish peoples.

“It is impossible to consider living without ideals.  However, when ideas lead to ideology, that’s a very dangerous thing.  Ideology then leads to creating the image of an enemy, and it leads to the murder and massacre that we’ve seen since the beginning of time.”  ~Micheal Haneke

I researched massacres on American soil.  The earliest I found was the infamous Boston Massacre in March 1770; 5 people died. The famous Valentine Day massacre at the height of Prohibition, Chicago 1929; 7 people died.

My search led me to Guadalupe Canyon massacre, AZ in 1881, cowboys were ambushed in their sleep; 5 people died.

…to the Golden Dragon massacre in San Francisco September of 1977, a gang dispute; 5 people died.

…to the ethnic massacres of Blacks in the south, Chinese in the west, Striking Coal miners in Colorado, American Indians across the country, including the Bloody Island massacre, Clear Lake CA, May 1850.

As I compared the past to the recent history beginning in San Ysidro CA, July 1984; 22 dead, 19 wounded.  Killeen TX 1991; 24 dead, 27 wounded.  Blacksburg VA, April 2007; 33 dead, 17 wounded. Newtown CT, December 2012; 28 dead, 20 wounded.  Sutherland TX, November 2017; 26 dead, 20 wounded. Orlando FL, June 2016; 49 dead, 58 wounded. Las Vegas NV, October 2017; 58 dead, 515 wounded…515!  I noted that past massacres were perpetrated by groups.

The British, a coal mine company acting in concert with the state’s National Guard, White settlers against Native Peoples, Whites against Blacks, fewer, but they happened too, Native People and Blacks against Whites, and gang wars.

Then the shift.  Recent massacres, with the exception of San Diego, were all perpetrated by a single person, acting alone.  Yet the death toll and number of wounded per incident has escalated considerably.

I do believe mental health is a serious part of the issue and needs to be addressed.  We all grapple with trying to find a reason for wanton massacre;  made more difficult by the current paradox of the Las Vegas shooter.

However, assault weapons and semi-automatic weapons modified by blunt stocks used by these killers, raises the the dead and wounded count significantly.  If killers were armed with single shot weapons or a knife, how many fewer lives would be lost?  Not to mention the untold suffering of grieving families, and recovering wounded; all whose lives have been forever altered.

Clearly something needs to be done!  Incidentally, my cursory search revealed that 68% of shooters are white males, fewer are Black men and even fewer are Asian.  There are NO Latinos on that list.  I feel a bigger threat to my life and that of my family coming from inside US borders than from the south.

“After every massacre in a school, Americans grasp at quick cures. ‘Let’s install metal detectors and give guns to teachers’.  Let’s crack down on troublemakers, weeding out kids who fit the profile of a gunman.  Let’s buy bulletproof vests for the students to scurry behind, or train kids to throw erasers or cans of soup at an attacker.”  ~Bill Dedman

The Facebook post I referenced in the beginning of this blog, was a picture of a handgun beside a rock of equal size.  The caption went something like, ‘Cain slew Abel with a rock, this is not about guns.’  I don’t disagree.  Cain was the first killer mentioned in the Bible.

However, my question is this:  If the massacre shooters had been armed only with a rock, how many people could they have killed or wounded in less than 10-15 minutes?

It is a tough time for all of us, as individuals and as a nation.  These are indeed times that try men’s souls and demand a strong faith.

Tolerance has several definitions, courtesy of the Merriam-Webster Dictionary:

“Capacity to endure pain or hardship.”

“Sympathy or indulgence for beliefs or practices differing from or conflicting with one’s own.”

“The act of allowing something.”

As John F. Kennedy is quoted, “Tolerance implies no lack of commitment to one’s own beliefs.  Rather it condemns the oppression or persecution of others.”

“Tolerance is giving to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself.”  ~ Robert Green Ingersoll

“Human diversity makes tolerance more than a virtue; it makes it a requirement for survival.”  ~Rene Dubos

In these instances, tolerance is considered a noble practice as we work toward greater unity and acceptance of one another.

What about when tolerance means ‘enduring pain or hardship’?  Too many among us are quietly tolerating all manner of injustice and abuse. At what point does this kind of tolerance become unacceptable?  ‘Zero tolerance’ has become a familiar phrase with regard to drugs and alcohol in the workplace, child abuse and neglect, the many inappropriate behaviors that are coming into public awareness. Is there something in your life right now that you would like to change, instead of remaining tolerant?

“Tolerance becomes a crime when applied to evil.”  ~Thomas Mann

“Don’t let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.”  ~Dalai Lama

“You must dare to disassociate yourself from those who would delay your journey… Leave, depart, if not physically, then mentally. Go your own way, quietly, undramatically, and venture toward Trueness at last.”  ~Vernon Howard

At some point in our lives we all ask ourselves, ‘What is my purpose?’ and perhaps, ‘What is the purpose of living?’  We are born, we live, we age, we die.  ‘Why?’

Indeed, at one level this is a collective question, certainly, a spiritual question directly related to our humanity and our evolving belief systems.

Surely, it is pure joy to discover our purpose and live it to the fullest extent possible.  Such a seductive, inviting and seemingly simple pursuit.  Mostly, NOT.

I do know a blessed few who have known from an early age where their destiny was taking them.  Passionately committed to the journey, they love what they do, their lives have purpose. But, as I have observed, for most of us it is a process of self-awareness and self-discovery.  Helen Keller comes to mind.  With faith and the trust of her beloved teacher, Anne Sullivan, she found and embraced her purpose.

“The purpose of human life is to serve, and to show compassion and the will to help others.” ~Albert Schweitzer

“Those who improve with age embrace the power of personal growth and personal achievement and begin to replace youth with wisdom, innocence with understanding, and lack of purpose with self-actualization.” ~Bo Bennett

“The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life from our souls.” ~Pablo Picasso

“The purpose of meditation is to make our mind calm and peaceful.  If our mind is peaceful, we will be free from worries and mental discomfort, and so we will experience true happiness.  But if our mind is not peaceful, we will find it very difficult to be happy, even if we are living in the very best conditions.”  Keisang Gyatso

I invite you to pursue your purpose with faith, passion and commitment.

Blessings!