January 2014
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Until recently I had a copy of The 7  Habits of Highly Effective People.  Now sitting on my desk is The 14 Habits of Highly Miserable People, an article by Cloe Madanes in Psychotherapy Networker.  I read it as satire, a well-done spoof.  But then again….

1.Be afraid, be very afraid, of economic loss.  The author points out the advantages and strategies that will contribute handsomely to your misery.

2.Practice sustained boredom.   Not as easy as it may sound.  But using the techniques outlined in this section should have very positive results.

3.Give yourself a negative identity.  Whatever negative identity you choose, play the part to its fullest.

4.Pick fights.  Be unpredictable.  Throw tantrums out of the blue.  Make mountains of mole hills and then deny your responsibility by claiming the other party is misunderstanding your intentions.  Express how hurt you are.

5.Attribute bad intentions.  Believe that no one wishes you well, that no one likes you or your opinions.  Hold grudges.

6.Whatever you do, do it only for personal gain.  Resist the temptation to help others.

7.Avoid gratitude. There is nothing in life to be thankful for.  Remind people of this constantly.

8.Always be alert and in a state of anxiety.  Nothing will ever work out for you. Cultivate pessimism.

9.Blame your parents. Your unremitting misery is someone else’s fault.

10.Don’t enjoy life’s pleasures.  Constantly remind yourself the world is a horrible place full of suffering. You don’t deserve pleasure.

11.Ruminate. Maintain a state of constant worry.  Focus on your personality defects and personal problems.  Give free reign to negative thinking and feeling.

12.Glorify or vilify the past.  If you had a wonderful moment as a child it is gone forever.  Or, your whole life has been a terrible ordeal.

13.Find a romantic partner to reform. Be selective.  Choose someone with real behavioral defects.  Perfect scenario for living as a miserable martyr.

14.Be critical.  Be critical of everything.  Get creative about what, when, where and who to criticize.  Offer these opinions to all you meet.

This article can be read in its entirety at:


Update: Rain.  Mendocino County has officially declared a drought.  Sonoma and Marin Counties are asking for voluntary reductions in water usage.

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